The Most Important Things To Look For In A Partner

When we are looking for a partner, we often forget the most important thing. Instead, we focus on the superficial properties.

We are looking for people who fit into our picture:  brown or blond hair, tall or short, adult or childish, nice or serious…

However  , this selection procedure is a problem in the longer term,  when we realize that we don’t click with our partner on a deeper level. That’s where relationship problems usually start.

So what should you really look for in a partner? Today we take a look at this.

Finding the right partner is a conscious choice

Searching for a partner should be a conscious choice. It comes from maturity and knowing what you are really looking for.

First, it is true that  there is no perfect person for you. You won’t find someone who has all the elements you want. However,  it is possible to be sure that you choose the partner that is best for you. 

The key to this is paying attention to the following aspects:

Their fears

Everyone has some form of fear. However,  some can hinder you negatively in your relationship. 

For example: is the person you chose afraid of being alone? If so, you will end up in a dependent relationship. You may be overwhelmed by your partner’s behavior. 

This is especially the case with the behavior when they feel safe and have a fear of you leaving them.

They may also be afraid that you are committing adultery. This is especially true if they have had a similar experience before. If this is the case, you should think about this carefully.

Sometimes it’s a lack of confidence. This can translate into constant questions: “Where have you been?”, “Who were you with?”, and keeping an eye on your phone and social networks.

Be aware of these fears and be aware of them before you get into a serious relationship. 

Their personality

They say opposites attract. However, the truth is  that it is important that your personality is somewhat similar to that of your partner. For example, if one of the two people is very orderly and the other is not at all, this can cause problems.

You cannot change the person you are in a relationship with. You must therefore be very clear about this. It is possible that the major differences may not irritate you at first.

Make sure it stays that way in the future.

Communication

There are people who find it difficult to talk about certain topics, while others can talk about everything.

Communication is essential in any relationship. If this fails, all will be lost.

Empty discussions and various problems can arise from a lack of communication and misunderstanding. That is why it is very important to understand the other person’s communication style.

Does he/she really listen to you? Does he/she tell you honestly what is going on? Does he/she lie regularly?

Knowing these things can help ensure that your relationship is successful.

What makes the other so attractive?

When you’re looking for a relationship,  the perfect picture will dazzle you. This will make you forget everything we just mentioned. However, it is very important  to remain realistic.

Eventually,  as time passes, the magic fades and both of you will have to work on the relationship. This does not happen automatically.

What keeps you together? There must be something. It could be a sense of humor or something else that attracts you to the other person. It must be something special and unique. If not, you may not have found the right person yet.

Finding a partner is not always a goal. Sometimes we’d rather wait to see where life takes us and who it brings. If you recognize yourself in this active quest, remember the above advice to create a good foundation for your future.