4 Common Relationship Mistakes
Although each person expresses love in their own way, affection is not only shown through words.
Throughout your life and your emotional growth you get to know yourself better and you also learn from relationship mistakes. You will also discover the “walls” that you sometimes build around you or place between yourself and your partner, so that you can continue to feel comfortable and happy.
But sometimes the walls are not so easy to spot. Sometimes you can act in an unhealthy way towards your partner and create mistrust and unhappiness instead of showing your partner that he or she is valued, loved and respected.
Common Relationship Mistakes
In this article, we’re going to look at some of the minor but common relationship mistakes couples make in their relationship that can drive two partners quite apart.
1. Love is not just saying ‘I love you’
You have probably experienced this yourself. You’ve been in a relationship where it became easy to simply say “I love you” every day. While these words provide comfort and security, the words alone are not enough to truly express your love.
Everyone expresses their love in their own way
- Some people are more expressive, while others who are more subdued tend to show their affection in a more subtle way that can only be interpreted on a deeper level of understanding. Just because their affection is less visible doesn’t mean they love less. There are countless different ways you can show your love.
- Some people expect the other person to show them how much they love them all day long with kisses, a touch, a hug… but you have to know that not everyone has the same need and that doesn’t mean that he/she loves us less because of it .
- Love can also be expressed through a glance if necessary. Maybe it’s just a smile that reminds you that your partner supports and loves you unconditionally. Sure, sometimes you may want your partner to be a little more expressive, to tell you every day how much he loves being with you, but what really matters is that the expressions of love are genuine. As long as they are absolutely sincere, it doesn’t really matter how often they occur or not.
Judge your partner by his/her actions, not just his/her words
- Words can sometimes lose their meaning or be misunderstood. It’s easy to lie with words, but actions never lie. Look at how your partner treats you, how he/she takes care of you, if he/she respects you… that’s true love.
- If you are the type of person who needs their partner to show affection every day and you may feel that your partner loves you less than you love him/her, then talk to your partner. Tell him/her exactly what you need.
2. Loving doesn’t mean giving away all of yourself in exchange for nothing
This is a trap many people fall into, so to speak. They think that loving their partner means that they have to give everything away, giving themselves to the partner unconditionally and without limits. But be careful.
- In love wisdom and balance are important. You give yourself to another person in the knowledge that you will form a ‘team’. You offer him/her yourself and he/she gives himself/herself to you. You also enrich your partner’s life and he/she yours. Based on your maturity and individuality, you become a being that grows every day.
- If you give up everything for the other person, there will come a day when you will not only feel empty inside, but also frustrated. You will realize that you locked yourself in the relationship without realizing it and now you can’t get out.
- Expecting your partner to do things for you is not selfish. Ultimately, both partners should take care of each other and both partners are equally responsible for the level of happiness in the relationship.
3. If something is bothering you, don’t wait quietly for the other person to realize they made a mistake
People cannot know everything. A common mistake people make in relationships is to think that if something hurts or bothers them, the partner will know.
Because of this, some people choose not to say what’s bothering them and eventually they get angry. They feel ignored by their partner and silently punish him/her. This is a very childish strategy.
Say what’s on your mind
Don’t be afraid to say what you think. If you’re upset about something, say it. If something hurts you, show this pain. If you need to ask something, ask. Your partner is the one you choose to be with.
You must create harmony between you through openness and cooperation, not a battlefield.
4. Don’t let your whole world revolve around your partner
Think about it: In a new relationship, you and your partner are just like children. You want your whole world to revolve around that other person. And that is allowed, because you have chosen to start a new life with this person.
But keep this in mind:
- It is important to keep developing yourself personally. This means that you have to keep learning every day, finding out who you are. Don’t neglect your studies, your friends or your work.
- Relationships are important, of course, but the other aspects of your life are also important, such as sports, your social circle and your personal space… all this enriches you as a person and that ensures that your self-esteem and security grows.
- Having a high self-esteem is very helpful for a happier relationship. It’s more mature. If you focus only on your partner and thereby neglect your own professional and personal growth, you will end up feeling frustrated and even blaming your partner for your unhappiness.
You grow as an individual and you grow as a couple. This is how you find true happiness in life. It’s more than worth it.
